There comes a time in every parent’s life when you have to make a serious stand for your kids. You feel like you have done just about everything you can, except march into school and do the job yourself. You have held countless conferences, emailed every teacher with ideas and suggestions, and pleaded to the principles and guidance counselors. However, nothing seems to work, and you are at your wit’s end.
I have been there with my daughter, and it is not a great place to be. It’s actually a rather lonely place, because friends and family could sympathize, but they had no real solutions for me. You get the typical “more discipline” or “more restrictions”, and the elder family members would swear by “the Woodshed”, but you know that stuff doesn’t work. The library is filled to the brim with books on “ADHD, How-to-change-everything-about-your-child-so-they-will-do-everything-that-is-completely-against-the-natural-tendencies-of-an-ADHD-person”, but most are written by Non-ADHD authors. The pediatrician tried to help by prescribing more medications, changing medications, and stopping medications, until finally, I suggested we should just try a horse tranquilizer! Again, a lonely and sometimes dark, place to be.
There were other problems at play, in addition to the ADHD. My son was never interested in the learning aspect of school, and he could really do without the social aspect of it is as well. Motivation was at about a 19 out of a million, and nothing I did worked. He scraped by with C’s, was quite content with that, and didn’t really appreciate me wanting more out of him. The teacher’s never had a moment’s trouble out of him, so what did they care that he wasn’t performing up to his potential. I’m not really sure if he ever even talked at school, until……….. he discovered that girls were the key. If you had a girlfriend, you didn’t get picked at. If you had a girlfriend, no one thought you were weird. If you had a girlfriend, all would be right with the world. However, it couldn’t be just any girl, it had to be a popular girl. It became his quest, his goal, his reason for getting out of bed every morning. Who cares that there were girls better suited to him, girls whom he actually knew and that thought he was a great guy, he had to have the “It-Girls”. Yeah, so as you can imagine, there was nothing at all right with that.
So, I was led to their final problem. Their Christianity. They were struggling. My husband and I had taught them right from wrong, to pray over the food that God has provided, and to be thankful for His blessings. For a long while, they were diligent. Sure, they said a prayer under their breath at lunch time, lest others would pick on them for saying a blessings, but at least they said it right? To them, faith and religion were about “rules” to follow. After a while, when hardly any of their peers had the same values, those “rules” became blurred. Questions developed, debates began, and I was off to the library again checking out titles like “Evolution vs. Genesis” and “How-to-explain-to-teenagers-that-there-is-indeed-a-God-and-why-they-should-follow-His-teachings”. Eventually, I had to throw my hands up, because while the majority of Christian’s weren’t looking, someone came in and deemed the rules laid out in the Bible by Jesus un-important…….and we let them. I realized I was a hypocrite, and I had no credibility with my children.
God finally spoke to me. After praying to Him for hours upon hours, the answer was as clear as a bell. Take responsibility for the care of what I have given to you. Stop entrusting that care to someone else, then being unhappy and frustrated with the results. Take My teachings seriously, and stop picking and choosing the ones that you like, and disregarding those that you do not like. Stop following the rest of the world because it is the easy way to fit in, do you think it was easy for my Disciples to follow me? You live in a country where it is acceptable to have your own beliefs, act on those beliefs, and shout those beliefs from the rooftops. Yet, you remain silent, and follow the herd to the slaughter.
I withdrew my daughter from school, the very next day. I allowed my son to finish the remaining two months of school, with the understanding that it would be his last days of public school. It was the best thing that I have ever done for my kids. Homeschooling is not perfect, it is not easy, and we have a lot of learning still to do, but I firmly believe it is His will. He gave those children to my husband and I, and we gave them away. Sure, we were following in the footsteps of countless others before us, but we gave them away, nonetheless. Who knows where they would be now if He hadn’t shouted in my ear “Take back My kids!”.